to the Meeko Love Podcast. I'm your host, Kameeko Love. And when I'm not educating about personal finance as the budget mom, I'm here diving into the exploration of my own passions and exploring a range of captivating topics. It's time to dive into conversations that ignite curiosity and inspire. Welcome back to another episode of the Meeko Love Podcast. I'm Kameeko Love, your host. And if you are new here, then welcome. Today we have another Ask Me Anything episode. can't believe like every single time I do one of these episodes, it makes me realize, well, wow, we just got through another three episodes because I try to do the ask me anything where I answer your pre-submitted questions. put up a question box up on my socials. you can find me on Instagram at the budget mom or at Miko love podcast. I just throw up a question box. It's where I answer your pre-submitted questions on these episodes. And every single time it's like, geez, and I try to do it like every four episodes. And so it seems to come up really, really fast. It's like, man, it's just remarkable that we are now over 10 episodes on the Meekaluv podcast. Just crazy. So today I have a ton of great questions that I'm going to get into. Some of them are going to require a little bit more of a longer answer I feel like. want to jump into a little more detail. So let's just jump into it. First one, how did you start The Budget Mom and what inspired you to begin this journey? Now, if you are following me or a follower or a community member over at The Budget Mom, then you know, probably know my story and why I started. But for anyone who is new to either The Budget Mom or just jumping onto the Meeko Love podcast, I am also known as The Budget Mom on Instagram. It's also my business. It's something I do full time. And essentially, it's a community of people, women mostly, from all over the world who are on a path to find financial fulfillment in their lives. Now, you may have noticed I did not say financial freedom. Financial freedom and financial fulfillment are two very, very different things. You can find financial freedom. You can pay off all your debt. You can have your dream job. You can have everything that that quote unquote freedom gives you. But at the end of the day, you can still be really unhappy. Financial fulfillment is more something that's deeper. It's internal. It's this feeling of knowing that you have reached a point in your life where you are happy and you have found three things, clarity, stability and confidence. Okay, I feel like you can have financial freedom and not have those things. There are a lot of people out there who pay off all of their debt. Okay, a lot of people assume that financial freedom means paying off your debt and investing enough to retire early. But those two things don't necessarily give you, for instance, confidence. Financial confidence is a huge thing. The ability to know you are making the right decisions for your unique values and situation. It's the being able to make financial decisions. Financial confidence is knowing that you don't have to second guess the decisions you're making with your money. Even if people around you are doing things differently, even if people around you are maybe questioning your decisions. When I found financial confidence in my life, it was just like a total game changer for me because it made me feel like I had so much power and control over my life and what I was doing with my money. And I did. It made me feel like I was taking that back for myself. So I started the budget mom breakdown of what the budget mom is. I mean, we do a lot just to jump over to my socials and dive right in. There's a lot there happening, but I started the Budget Mom back in 2016. Now I started, I was a newly divorced single mom with a small baby and in a pile of debt, learning how to live on one income, walking away from a life where I went from having a home to two incomes, to family dinners, to being completely alone, one income, needing to find my own place. pile of debt. And so for the first time really truly being alone in my life, and I knew I wanted to find a way to have a better life for my children. I just didn't know what that really entailed or how to get there. I knew it was something I wanted, but it felt so far-fetched, so surreal that I didn't even know where to start. And to be honest, I was very, very lonely and scared during that time of my life. And so I set out, got on the internet, and I basically just started sharing my story. And it was really to find other women who were in maybe in the same situation, but who could understand how I was feeling. I needed a safe space to be able to talk about my fears, my struggles, especially with my debt, where I didn't have to feel embarrassed or judged. And so I just, started putting it all out there on social media and I really did find an amazing community, the Budget Mom community. And as that community grew and my socials grew, the Budget Mom turned into a business. Now I'll never forget the day that I realized you could make money online. When I first started the Budget Mom as a way to build this community, I never set out on the intention to make money. That wasn't like, I didn't go and say, I'm gonna start this business and make all this money. was. I need to find a community who understands me so I don't feel so alone and so judged and feel just completely, I felt like an outcast. I felt like I failed my child. I was dealing with a ton of guilt and shame and embarrassment and I had anxiety and I had depression and it was just a really dark, hard time part of my life. And so when I started making, as I was kind of working through my own budgeting journey and how to you know, pay off my debt and I started making my own tools to do that worksheets and different things. I got more and more people asking me, well, Miko, the worksheet that you're using in that video would really help me. Where do I find it? Or would you be willing to share that with me? And I started sharing my stuff for free. And then it became to a point where there were so many requests I literally could not keep up. I couldn't get all of them out in time. And I just said, geez, know, I had once someone reached out to me and said, you know, how much is that worksheet that you're using? And it's like snapped in my brain, like, my gosh, I could actually sell these and make a little bit of money from my time and my effort from creating it and sharing it. So I think I started selling my, my very first budget template was a monthly template that you print out at home for like a dollar. and I made $25,000 off that first template and it was just mind blowing to me. That's how I started the Budget Mom and what really inspired me was the community aspect and really getting to a place where I felt like I was providing a better life for my children, especially financially. never wanted to be, like, I don't know if you've ever been in a situation where you didn't know how much you had in your checking account and so you're questioning, right? The unknown. gives you all this anxiety you go to the store. If you if you read my book my money my way if you've heard me do public speaking events you know my ice cream cone story. My one dollar cone story is where I went in literally took my child to the park or to McDonald's after the park got an ice cream cone for a dollar nine and I bought it on a credit card because I literally did not know if I had a dollar nine in my checking account I was scared and I was embarrassed that if my debit card declined. For a dollar and nine ice cream cone, I would have been so embarrassed, so I didn't. It was the unknown. I never wanted to be in that place again, but not only that, I was sick and tired every single time I would do something, right? And I would rack up my credit card, buy a bunch of gifts for Christmas or go out for my son's birthday party or, you know, buy a ton of crap for our new apartment on my credit card. It felt good in moment because I was getting all these things. I felt like I was being a good mom for, you know, getting things for his birthday and having a lot of presents under the tree and all these things. But in reality, I was spending to make myself feel better as a mom. I wasn't spending for my child. It took a lot of years to be able to say that out loud and admit that out loud that I was spending money. was putting myself in debt and using my child as an excuse to do so. So that's kind of a little bit. More interested in my story, can follow me over on Instagram. I'm also on Facebook. Okay, so how do you stay motivated to stick to a budget even when it's hard? Yes, when you are just starting out on the budgeting journey, it can feel very overwhelming. It is hard. And anyone who tells you it's easy and simple is giving you a crock of crap. It is hard. It's hard because you're learning all these new things and you're not only that you're discovering all these new things about yourself and about your money situation that you might have been maybe trying to hide or not wanting to see or look at. And not only that, I feel like with budgeting nowadays, when I first started in 2016, there wasn't all these budgeting accounts. There wasn't all, I mean, I feel like it's everywhere now, but back in the day, no one was sharing their real numbers. And so me doing that, one I felt is what made people resonate with me is because I was actually sharing my real numbers. I still do to this day, but budgeting is hard. And that's why in this process is hard. This journey is hard. It's not always easy. It's not always celebrating financial wins. You have setbacks, you make mistakes. There are days where you want to give up. There are days where you're wondering why the frick you're doing what you're doing. That's why step number one on my journey is discovering your why. How do you stay motivated to stick to a budget? Well, first thing, we got to cross out the word motivated in that sense because I'm not. Like maybe one day a month I feel motivated to work on my budget. Sure, there are things that I get excited about that then turn into me working harder and diving deep into my budget and figuring all these things out, right? But at the end of the day, motivation is not what's going to get you through this journey. Motivation is going to be the spark that gets you there. but it's not gonna hold you there. What you need to rely on is self-discipline and willpower. Self-discipline and willpower and dedication is what you need to be reliant on. If you're waiting for motivation, you're gonna be waiting for a long time. It's gonna fail you every single time. So let's talk about how do I stay dedicated? to my budget, even when it's hard? How do I have self-discipline around my budget, even when it's hard? Number one, it starts with routine and consistency. The only way you're gonna build those healthy habits in your life, like tracking your spending, even if it's not daily, right? But tracking your spending, making sure that you are on top of your savings goals, whether that's if you automate your savings contributions, right? It's investing for the future for your retirement. All of these small habits that we're building up in our lives to get us to a place where we are financially secure and have financial fulfillment all start with consistency day in and day out. Once we build those habits, then we lean on those habits and that dedication rather than the motivation. When I get up in the morning, do you think I want to do my money morning routine? No. but I do it because it's something I've been doing every single morning for the last 10 years. It's almost like if I, it's like when you're, when you work out on a regular basis, if you don't do it, you feel like you're missing something. It's the same way with my money and my money routine and the way I manage my money. You'll also come to learn that I know it seems like the not knowing is better. I know it feels like it's not as scary. If you don't look at it, you don't have to know. If you don't know, then you don't have to deal with it. But I promise you now, you have to get to a place where you understand and know because then you can create a plan. Having that plan, even if you haven't set it into action yet, having that plan alone significantly decreases your anxiety. And so once you get over the hump and that fear of the knowing, having the courage, to be able to look at your whole entire debt picture rather than just the minimum payments, right? Maybe you're avoiding looking at your credit card statements. Maybe you're avoiding looking at your bank statements because you know that your bank account's in the negative. We have to start looking. We have to start getting over that fear and know our situation because once we know, then we can set that plan into action and start creating that plan and then put that plan into action. For me, how do I stay dedicated? One, it's consistency and repetition of good financial habits that give me that solid foundation that I can build on to be financially successful in my life. But it's also having the knowledge to make the right financial decisions and the best financial decisions for me in the future and now. And the only way you're gonna know and have that knowledge is by looking. is by getting over that fear, looking at your entire debt picture, looking and opening up your credit card statements, your bank statements every single time they come in. So that's how I deal with it, even when it's hard, because your budget is there not only just when things are good, right? Your budget is there to have your back. Your budget is there to work for you even when things are bad. Let me tell you right now, if your financial... situation and the way you manage your money and your budget, if it only works when times are good, it's wrong. Something is off. Because the whole point of doing this is to give yourself that security and the financial options to help you get through the bad times. That's why they exist. So if you're, if you are on like cloud nine only when things are okay, but you feel like your whole financial world is crashing on you when things aren't okay, it's time to rethink that. that strategy, your money strategy. Okay, how do you balance spending for your family while also saving for long-term goals? That is such a great question. I think that's also asking, how do you deal with the balance of enjoying your life now, life is short, versus taking care of your future self, right, and those long-term goals? I think for me, life events really shape where you stand on this on either side of that line, right? Life is short or taking care of your future self. And I think for me, when it comes to balancing those two things, major life events have shaped how this ultimately affects me in my life. So recently, back in April of 2023, I lost my mom. She, perfectly healthy. perfectly healthy, probably the strongest woman I knew, the healthiest woman I knew, buck and bales. She rode horses every single day, very, very active. No signs of her. She was hardly ever sick. I think maybe I've seen her maybe maybe with one or two colds in her life, never seen her in bed. And she was just gone within a day. It opened my eyes even more to life is short and that the people that you love that you kind of just assume will always be there might not be, that we aren't indestructible, right? And so for me, I probably spent more since my mom has passed, especially on my grieving journey than I have, than I usually do. Because now what I'm doing is, I'm kind of overcompensating for those feelings of what if they're not here tomorrow? What if my life is cut short tomorrow, right? And so having something like that happen to you in your life and it happening to me, it really just changed my perspective. It made it clearer. It made it more real that you can be gone tomorrow. But I also think that, you know, Balancing spending for your family, sure, we have to take care of our needs in the now, right? We have to take care of the roof over our head, food, clothes on our children's backs, our backs, those types of things. But I think you don't necessarily have to spend in order to enjoy your family, in order to enjoy your friends, in order to show love to the people that you care about and that you value. I think that's another thing that I really learned because at the end of the day, I can't pay to have my mom back. I can be the richest person on earth and I don't have enough money to bring my mom back. Money is useless in that situation, but I can make it more of a priority in my life. to value and put more energy and be present for the people that I have in my life right now. And that doesn't always necessarily mean spending money. So for me, the balance is focusing more on the memories that I'm making with the people that I value in my life, spending quality time with them, letting them know how much I love them and care about them, and then taking care of my long-term goals. All of that for me is automated and is on autopilot. All of my investments for my retirement, the things that I know I want to save for, like we want to build a barnaminium back on our property, I haven't started saving for it. But when I do, I'll save a little bit from each paycheck. I'll save any extra money where I can find it. That's a long-term goal, right? We're looking five plus years out for that. And so at the end of the day, balance to me is making sure I'm present and truly here for the people I love, making that my priority, and then being realistic with the long-term goals that I have and what I can truly accomplish with the income I have right now, and building on those, that progress as I go on through my life. What's your strategy for managing spending during the holiday season? I am a sinking fund lover and user all day long. will teach it and preach it until I am no longer here. The reason being is if you want a stress free spending holiday, have a sinking fund in your life. Here's where holiday spending and why it's so difficult and why we tend to overspend during this time of the year. One, there's a lot of freaking pressure. There's a lot where we literally are exposed to so many different marketing tactics that are there just to get us to spend. we don't even realize it. We don't even know that we're even being exposed to these types of things because we're so used to it. I always feel like too, like when it comes to influencers, you don't know even know when you're being influenced to buy something nowadays. feel like it's a whole people are gotten real good at storytelling, but you have that social that you have the pressure, you have exposure. Now more than ever as companies and influencers, they beef up their marketing tactics and their marketing campaigns and their different ads. it's just, I feel like the holiday season is hard in itself. But the way I deal with it is during the holiday season, what happens is we spend so much in a very short amount of time. Right? It's such a huge hit to our budget because holiday spending is a, I mean, it can add up to a lot of money, especially if you're talking like November through December, because we have Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Christmas, and New Year's all within that timeframe. That's a lot of spending. It's a big hit to your budget all at one small amount of time. The reason I use sinking funds, now sinking funds is just saving a little bit of money from each paycheck for an upcoming expense you know is going to happen or event that you know is going to happen. Now the reason sinking funds are remarkable and they work so well is because rather than them being such a huge hit to our budget, it gives us the space and time we need to save small amounts, small increments. That way it's not such a huge hit to our budget in the moment. But at the end of the day, the end of that timeframe, right, we end up with a large sum of money that we can then use for that event or that expense. So I handle all of my holiday season spending and managing and saving with sinking funds. Now, for instance, for Christmas this year, I wanted to save $2,000. Now keep in mind, Christmas covers everything from Thanksgiving to the end of December for me. So it does cover my Thanksgiving, I host Thanksgiving at my house, so it covers my Thanksgiving dinner that I do with family. It covers any Black Friday shopping that I'm going to do. It covers any Christmas shopping, decorations that I'm going to do. So anything I would say Thanksgiving and on through the new year, I would say, because I do include New Year's in there as well, is included in that $2,000 that I saved. I started saving for this goal in January. and I told myself I wanted to have this $2,000 saved by November. That gives me 11 months to save. So if you take the $2,000 and divide that by 11, that's essentially at like $182 a month. That's exactly what I've been saving, $182 a month.$182 a month is a lot easier on your budget then 2000 scrambling to come up with the $2,000 say in November or December, right? This is why I always say the sinking funds are really like your stress free savings accounts or your stress free goals because truly there is no better feeling than knowing you have the money already saved for something like that. So I, there are a couple holidays that I do this for. I do it for Christmas. I do it for birthdays, specific birthdays, not all birthdays in my life. So I do my children and my husband's birthday, our wedding anniversary is in there, Valentine's Day is in there. Now, when I first had debt and I started the sinking fund process, I only had one sinking fund, right? Because a lot of my money, my priority was paying off my debt, but I still had one sinking fund and it was Christmas. Did I save as much as I do now? No. I think at that time it was like $25 a paycheck, which at that time I was getting paid twice a month, so $50 a month. But it was something. It gave me a spending limit on those holiday expenses with money that I already had saved. Complete game changer when it comes to learning how to save intentionally for spending. What is your approach to teaching your kids about money? Great question. You know, my son James has been on this journey with me from day one. And he was my huge motivation when I paid off my debt. He was my reason why I paid off all my debt. I think for me, don't I don't just give, for instance, I get asked this all the time. Do I give my kids an allowance? I do, but not for your typical type chore stuff. So my son gets an allowance for reading an extra book every single month. He gets maybe an allowance for doing an extra credit assignment at school. Going above and beyond his chores, right? So one of the things that James helps me with is going out and watering the goats. Well, if he goes out there and maybe brushes them, maybe feeds them their hay, right? It goes above and beyond just what I'm asking or what's expected of him. then I'll give them allowance. But here's my thing. I always said that kids learn money, healthy money management skills by watching you, by watching what you do. And I'm not talking about just sitting down at your table and having them watch you do your expense tracker or having them help you stuff your envelopes. Those are all good things to have them do. I'm talking about them watching you spend money in your everyday life. you spending with a credit card? Are you spending maybe with cash envelopes in your wallet? And either sitting there maybe watching you count out your cash. They soak up more than what you realize. Another thing about when it comes to teaching kids about money is we need to stop teaching them just the dollar amounts of the dollar bills. we need to actually start teaching them how to provide value in people's lives. How do they be valuable? Because at the end of the day, what people pay for is value. So I always teach James, like, it's not just about going out and maybe mowing someone's lawn, right? Sure, that provides a service of value to someone's life, but Can you do it with a smile on your face? Can you do it maybe giving them a compliment at the, you when you go and maybe tell them that you're there like, you know, I hope you have a wonderful day or maybe even ask how is your day going? Because then you add another level of friendliness, of kindness, of compassion to a service you're already providing. How do you add value? I also think, you know, James is at an age, my son just turned 12 and he's in all AP classes this year, one of them being AP algebra. And so he gets numbers, he's really good at math. I'm in the process of also teaching James how the world works. Our economy. why the stock market goes up and down and responds the way it does. So yes, it's something that's maybe for little bit for older children who are just maybe beyond just the grasp of budgeting and saving money and the different dollar bills and all those things, right? James is now getting into the process where he's starting to understand how our world works. So for me, it's having them be involved in your daily routine. with what you do as far as your money management, being aware and conscious of that they learn by watching you, showing them how to provide value in other people's lives. And as they get older, bringing in some of those concepts where they can have that basic knowledge and skills, maybe like investing, know, taxes. filling out a checkbook, right? All these things, I feel like most of it when they're younger come from them just watching you. And we need to really step away that just thinking that just because we're giving our kid an allowance teaches them something. You have to show them that what to do with that money when they actually get it, if that makes sense. Okay. What's your favorite success story from someone in your budget mom community? Great question. So I, in my book, My Money, My Way, I share a ton of amazing stories from community members all over the world on, I mean, I really dive into their story and their successes and their entire journey. It's just remarkable. And I'm just so blessed that they were willing to share their story for my book because I think it's very, important to show different people's situations and circumstances and situations where we can get a different perspective on money management and decision in people's lives. But as I was looking at this question earlier, there was a story recently that I saw in our private Facebook group, TBM Family, anyone can join. It's called TBM Family on Facebook, but essentially it's from Angela and she wrote, We are debt free except for our house.$253,000 paid off in exactly five years. Forever thankful for finding the budget mom and diving deep into all that Kamiko shared. This seemed like an impossible goal for five years. It is all possible when you have a plan, faith, and remember your why. For my husband and I, our why has been to achieve financial freedom in order to not feel tied to jobs that do not fill our soul. Then she goes on to say, here are some things that are not pictures. She shows some pictures in the post, but they're not picture, but we're a part of the journey. My husband working two jobs, both of us doing Instacart runs on our time off to bring in extra cash, saying no to things we wanted, but weren't a need. Sleepless nights wondering what if, an army of family and friends who cheered us on during the journey. Our advice for a payoff journey, number one, come to terms with your debt. Number two, create a plan. Number three, continue to reasonably enjoy your life. For us, we enjoy traveling, so we extend the time it would take us to be debt-free in order to be able to still enjoy traveling through the process. I absolutely love that story. I resonate with that story a lot because I always tell people when you're on a debt-free journey, the timeframe in which you pay off your debt is up to you. You can be super, super totally focused and give up everything that brings you joy in order to reach that goal as fast as you can. Or maybe you're someone like me who doesn't want to give up everything that brings me joy, doesn't want to stop living because I'm paying off debt. Like I said, that line of life is short, enjoy it now versus taking care of those long-term goals. I sit in the middle of that line when it comes to paying off debt. There are certain things that I value that I'm not willing to sacrifice to pay off my debt as fast as I possibly can. And I know there's going to be Dave Ramsey probably want to slap me in the face for saying that, but it's true. Yes, my number one goal was to pay off debt. Absolutely. But I didn't want to stop living or give up everything that made me happy to do it. So I compromised. I sat back and I said, okay, here are the things I'm okay with and here are the things that I'm not. For them, it looks like it was one thing, traveling. So that was something that they said, okay, this is something where we have to budget and plan for. Yes, is it gonna slow down our timeframe to being debt-free? Yes, but it's worth it to us because it's something that we value. So that's just a story and a win that I saw just. within the last few days that just really, it reminds me a lot of my journey. I did not have that much debt. only had over, I just had over just over $77,000 worth of debt. But the process and the focus was the same. What's your approach to building an emergency fund? Great question. So I do believe everyone should save enough for three to six months worth of expenses. Let me explain the three to six months. So I believe everyone needs to start off what I call a kickoff emergency fund. Okay, a kickoff emergency fund is just an amount that you know for sure guaranteed that you can save within the next three months. Okay, maybe this is $500. Maybe this is $1,000. Maybe this is $4,000. Maybe it's $100. I want you to be able to look at your money and your finances and say, okay, I can realistically save $50 every single month. great. Do that for a full three months. Here's why I believe kickoff emergency funds are way more important than just saying, I'm going to save a thousand dollars because sometimes even that thousand dollars can seem so out of reach. People just get, they just don't even start. They, they stop. What's the point is what they think to themselves. I want you to get in the habit of one intentionally saving But I want there to be an opportunity in your life to prove to yourself that you can do it. So much of the time I see on people's financial journeys that they set themselves up to fail before they even start. And it begins with not believing in what they're capable of. It's starting out with that really negative mindset, that scarcity mindset that doesn't allow us to think that it's possible. Being able to see yourself actually realistically save XYZ or this amount for three months is really powerful as far as our financial confidence goes and building up that confidence and that belief in ourself. Then saving enough to get to three to six months worth of expenses. Now I say three months if you have a steady paycheck, a guaranteed job, steady income, guaranteed income, right? So three months worth of expenses, six months worth of expenses if maybe you have a job that's really sporadic, that doesn't pay you the same amount every single month. Maybe you could lose that job tomorrow, maybe it's not that stable. That's where I would say go even more and do six months worth of expenses. And the amount that you save, let's talk about that very quickly. I'm the type of person where when I save up my emergency fund, When I say expenses, three to six months worth of expenses, my expenses include everything, not just necessities. Some people think that their emergency fund is only for to cover a necessities. I don't work like that. I want my emergency fund to cover my life as if nothing has changed. That means my investment contributions. That means my fund envelope. That means my miscellaneous category. It's literally having my life stay the exact same even though I may not have the income to do so. That's what my emergency fund and where that comes in. So it's all personal preference as well. If you want your emergency fund to only cover the necessities, that's up to you. For me, I like it to cover everything that I have going on in my life. So does that mean I have to say a little bit more? Sure. But God forbid if something happened to my income where I needed that emergency fund. then I know I would literally not have to give up anything that I'm already doing. All right, so last question that I'm gonna answer. How do you handle joint finances in a relationship? I don't believe they have to be joint. I get so much pushback on this. I get hate mail for days, but I give no craps because at the end of the day, what you and your partner do with your money is up to you and no one else. No one else has freaking business. Just because you don't have everything combined doesn't mean that you are failing your relationship. It doesn't mean that you don't believe in your relationship. I think it's such a crock of crap that when people say, if you can marry the other person, then you can combine finances. Can we just step back for a minute and say that it's not just about marriage? mean, and this is coming from someone who has gone through a divorce and who has had to walk away with nothing. I I'm hoping and I wish that every woman out there has access to their own money. It is needed because at the end of the day, if they were in a situation that they needed to get out of, they would have their own money to do so. I feel like not having access to your own money keeps you in situations that you necessarily wouldn't always stay in. You are important enough to have that option. even if you are married or have a partner. You are entitled to have your own money without someone telling you that, you're ruining your marriage or you don't, you you're not fully participating in your marriage or you're just waiting for a marriage to fail. No, Chris and I have been together for over nine years now and we have never fully combined our finances and we never will. Sure. Do we have joint financial goals together? Absolutely. Do we have a joint checking account and savings account together? Absolutely. Do we sit down and have financial meetings and talk about our financial future together? Absolutely. But I still have my own checking account and I still have my own money. And the same goes with Chris. I don't feel like just because you are married or because you have a partner, you have to combine all your money. I just don't feel that that's, maybe it works for me and Christopher and I know it works for, mean, and I've. talk to thousands of different couples that it also works for. My thing is here is there's no right or wrong way to handle finances in a relationship. It's what's up to you. What's more important than how you manage your finances together, it's how you communicate about your finances together. Because a lot of the time, this tension of finances in the marriage or in the relationship isn't just due to just money. It's the way we communicate about that money. Communication is the very, literally the most important thing in a relationship. If you cannot communicate with your partner in a healthy, productive way, it's never going to work. So for me, I like to focus on how do we communicate about our finances as a team, as a unit, as a partnership. That's going to get us to a how we manage and combine and what we don't combine our finances in a really healthy way. Because then what we have is honesty. I never, I, gosh, I hope that I'm never in a relationship where I don't feel safe enough to say, I want my own money. I don't think there will ever be a day that ever happens. I am the type of person, I've had enough life experiences, things have happened to me in my life where I want access to my own money. And I had to find a partner that was okay with that, that respected that. And so that's how I handle joint finances in a relationship. 100 % up to you and your partner. Doesn't matter what anyone else says. So that was, I know it was a lot of information. We're going on, geez, 50 minutes now. That's another episode of Ask Me Anything. I said, I try to do this about every four episodes or so. Keep your eyes out on my social for that pre-submitted question box. like to answer as many questions as I can here on the podcast, especially since I don't always see my messages on socials. I swear Instagram likes to hide them from me. But this is just another platform that allows me to answer your questions. And I'm just really grateful that you sent them in. So until next time. join the podcast, make sure to subscribe, share this podcast with your friends and leave a review wherever you are listening. Your support helps me reach even more listeners and keeps the conversation going. Until next time, keep feeding your curiosity.